Hey you! Did you trick a bunch of ...less informed....investors into buying you a bunch of mass spectrometers because you did genomics a while back?
Did you already try underpaying a lot of very young and capable seeming scientists with chemistry degrees but no experience, and are SHOCKED to discover content level expertise is required to do mass spectrometry based -omics?
After all your ...celebrations...that you were now a field leader in proteomics or metabolomics or mass spectrometry of some kind.. do you have just enough money left to finally hire a full time expert for that fleet of instruments?
You'll be sad to learn that a fleet of instruments may take more than 1 person to operate. I personally think a 1:1 ratio is generally pretty ideal. However, if part of that money came from guys with tattoos on their necks and a lot of muscles despite the fact they don't seem to go to the gym much, you might need to get those big heavy boxes generating ".RAW" files.
This might not be what these authors intended for HELIOS, but it might be where it sees the most use given the 10 or so "multi-omics" companies I have on my watch list for their upcoming bankruptcy sales. I could put a TIMSTOF HT to very good use if I could get one for a court mandated 20% of original price even if you're new at this stuff that you paid list price for it.
Disclaimer - This blog post is a joke to promote a really incredibly clever paper from one of the very best teams of mass spectrometrists on planet earth. Nothing else written here should be implied as linked to any real events or your scammy company or any other scammy company. Heck, if you have a scammy company like the one I joked about here, I certainly don't know about it or 7 others. Don't tell me about it, shame on you, and go hire some professionals and do good proteomics for the good of mankind!
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